There is Too Much Aweomeness For This Text Bar

Where do I begin?

Screw the quote of the day. I'm just going to give you a sit-rep (situation report) and skip the topic I've been wanting to do for a while. I'm going to ignore and just tell you about what has happened to me the past couple of days.

Hmm, where do I begin? That is the question of the day. Let's begin with Monday. Ooh, Spanish...

Note: This is from Monday, I wrote it during school on a piece of loose-leaf paper.

Before I get to the quote of the day (screw that now...), I have the best highlight of the day. The absolute best!
I walk into Spanish today, normal Monday. (Monday's shouldn't exist) but we have a sub. She has long, stringy blackish-brown hair, black business pants, black sandals, pink sweater and matching jacket. She has a light Spanish accent (go figure). Remember how I said we're learning the alphabet? Well, the sub (Senora Sra. Collins) passed out a piece of paper. I have it right here. Lemme - oh my God! I'm writing this in my homeroom and our regular teacher is gone and we have a sub... Guess who it is! :D MR. SMILEY! :)
Anyway, back to the Spanish incident. The paper is small and narrow and it says, El Alfabeto, that means "The Alphabet" in Spanish. There in a column is all the letters and what looks like the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz, holding a rifle.
My first thoughts are these: Oh no, plu-eez! don't be a song!! And... why is there a guy with a rifle on my paper.
Sure enough, there's an alphabet song and its on a friggin' casset tape. And the sub puts the tape in the "boom-box" (This isn't the 1990s anymore!) and its starts playing. Like it was in the middle of a... I don't think "song" was a good word to describe it... It was more of like... Spanish sounds... awkward, Spanish sounds... O_O You get the picture. Do you know how hard it is to be laughing your head off inside and having to keep it in and be silent? Oooh, lemme tell you what. I was clamping my hand down over my mouth and trying SO HARD not too... Oh man.
She flipped it to the right side and it starts like this, "Pretend I'm your drill sergeant." I was like, O_O WHA!? **I have random instrusions from what's happening around me. They will be like this. Here's the first one: The girls in front of me are feeling sorry for another girl because she couldn't by a pure. *rolls eyes*
And then, "And my parrot friend Paco will help you." P-Paco? O_O Then a slow snare beat started **Now they're talking about purses!! and then a whistle joined in and the march of boots! Oh no! The Spanish Army is coming!! ¡¡Noo!!
The lady starts to say the alphabet like to the tune of "I don't know what I've been told. I don't know what I've been told. Sound off! 1,2." You know... And just when I think **They're gossiping! the hell is over... Nope! The snare and whistle speed up! ¡¡Oh no!! Aye-yai-yai!!
Oh man! I was laughing and crying and Adrian and I exchanged many O_O faces. The day has barely started and it starting great. See! I told you nothing interesting happens during the weekend. Thus, I won't blog on the weekends. It all happens during school. That's why I didn't post anything on Sunday. **Ha! They're seeing how their names sound with "Smiley" as the last name. Lol. Ones initials would be BS. =3
I'll wait until I get home to write more.

There's a break in the paper and wow. Can you believe that? It was crazy. Then, I come back in about five lines later saying,

I'm back and its' 2:05 and I'm in math. Another war has broken loose. I'm reporting to you live from Mrs. Taylor's 3rd Period, Regular Math Class and a tweety war has broken loose. The casualties are mounting up!
The girl that - breaking news! A pencil! has shattered close to my position. The enemy is using NEW WEAPONS!

And then it breaks and that's the end... Well, a war in Math and Spanish was absolutely hilarious. But, WAIT, hold the presses! Science was EVEN BETTER!

IF I CAN FIND THE STUPID PAPER! Uno momento. Aha! Found it. Haha!

Okay, Adrian and I love to play the game called Random Word. Here's lemme explain: You have two books, two totally different books and you have to flip to a random page, pick and word and try to string it together to make a sentence. And LEMME TELL YOU, the sentences Adrian and I have are pretty... explicit. We have Science together so once we finish our work, we have about 10 minutes to play random word. Here's the ones we got for Monday.

Adrian was using the book was A Great and Terrible Beauty. and I was using Gears of War: Anvil Gate.

Here we go! Warning, some of these are kind of droop to the sexual side... Sorry, it was never INTENDED, trust me. I'm not THAT deranged. And don't ask me HOW they did, they just did... Here we go.

1. Gemma refuses Mademoiselle Adam.
2. He flares f***ing dresses.
3. Felicity ran up his winterlands.
   
4. Gods decided she flows up a constillation.
   
5. Bernie murdered Sam.
6. Kartick killed Gemma.
7. Baird desires Elain.
   
8. Marcus should count scarves.
   
9. Mrs. Mitchell looks definately French.
   
10. Dom may suddenly hold Baird.
11. Mother's attention turns to Ann.
    
12. Mathieson siezures out naked.
    
13. Cole managed to understand.
    
14. "See it's natural!" roared Grandmama.
    
15. Dizzy pins her behind Marcus.
16. Ithal married Kartick.
    
17. He exhales on a fondling tongue.
    
18. Pippa cuts his mouth of Treascu.
    

Why, yes I know these are mostly sexual or just sound OVER ALL wrong. There are a few that sound innocent. I'll discuss each sentence so you can better understand them.
Sentence 1: Gemma is a girl, number one and Mademoiselle is a like saying ma'am in French... and Adam is a guy...
Sentence 2: Okay, I'm SORRY but my eyes happened to gaze upon a foul word. I'm sorry, I shall never do it again but it was FUNNY as heck when Adrian looked at her book and burst out laughing. She managed to tell me "dresses" and we were both laughing.
Sentence 3: Felicity is a girl from Adrian's book. A girl from a school or something. A boarding school, I believe. When we had the sentence "Felicity ran up his..." we were terrified of what word would come next. Thankfully, winterlands did....
Sentence 4: Okay. Marcus is a BUFF guy that is completely solemn and utterly manly. Counting scarves would be a BIG step down for him. If you get the time, look him up. In fact. Google him. Marcus Fenix, Gears of War. It's funnier once you actually see what he looks like.
Sentence 5: That one really didn't make ANY SENSE.
Sentence 6: Bernie is a girl, about a sixty-year-old gal Gear and Sam is another girl Gear but much younger. They never talked much in the book but the funny thing was. In Science, Adrian and I sit by a guy named Sam and we always tease him about dying. So when I found the word "Sam" we pointed at him and laughed. Sorry Sam...
Sentence 7: Kartick and Gemma are a couple... So this one was funny for Adrian.
Sentence 8: Baird is a single man and he's the funniest guy EVER meet (if he were real) and Elain is Mademosielle Adam's wife.... And she's dead.
Sentence 9: This one wasn't that funny.
Sentence 10: Okay, Dom aka Mr. Sensitive (Loooong story) is a dude... yeah, he's a Gear, soldier. Gears are soldiers by the way. And Baird. Dom and Baird are both guys. Well, looks like we got a little bit of gay action going on.

I'm gonna skip to the very best:
Sentence 15: Dizzy is a hill-billy and ranks 100+ on the red-neck o meter. And Marcus again, look him up, and HER is pinned BEHIND Marcus... Oooh, sorry Anya. Lol. That probably didn't make sense but whatever.

Okay. Now, that was only MONDAY. Tuesday is a whole other story.

Tuesday, I mentioned on the last post that I had a football game to go to since the band was playing at it. And it was a lot better than last years. Last years was terrible because like 80% of the band was playing in the actual football game so there weren't many players there... And whenever we got a touchdown, the band would play a song called Across the Field and I was playing a really low part and it sounded soooo melancholy!
But this year, oh, this year was great.
The call time for Band was 4:30, we had to be in the Band Hall by 4:30 and school gets out at 4:00. So, Adrian and I leave for the Band Hall and sit there along with my other Trumpet buddy Caitlin and she would use her iPhone and take a lot of pictures of us at once. And she would keep taking them and you're laughing and she's STILL taking the pictures. Most of them were great. I wonder if I could post them here... I'll investigate on that subject. But mine was sooo funny!
My face was sooo priceless. My eyebrows were pulled up and together and my mouth was like D: and it was hilarious. Adrian's made me laugh the hardest.
We were sitting on the window sill and Adrian had her feet on a Tuba case and she accidentally, while Caitlin was taking the pictures, tipped it and she almost slipped off the windowsill and her face was INDESCRIBABLY hilarious. Her mouth was wide open in a O-shape, her bangs in her face, and she had a double chin! It was awesome.
Okay, the game starts and the band has to sit on the bleachers in a designated section. But, the only thing bad was the fact that the sun was BEATING down on us and it was sooo hot. Texas has no anvil on us Band geek. And I swear the whole RIGHT SIDE OF MY BODY was on FIRE because the sun was to the right. "Chelsea! You're ear is soo red!" "So is yours!" Yeah, my ear withered and burned and died on Tuesday...
And then, towards the end, they handed out bottled water - THANK GOD. and the sun was finally receding in the sky and this Saxophone player on the bleacher row below us was using empty bottles, blowing air into the bottles, twisting the midsection - making the air really compressed and this slowly eased off the cap and those caps SHOT! I mean, they CANNONED. It was awesome. And some of them went pretty far too. One of them his a old guy in the head in the audience. It was hilarious.
Sadly, we lost both games, A-team and B-team. And, oh no, Remember Riley? He got a fractured wrist. Oh no, Riley!

I honestly think I'm done.

SEE! I told you my weekdays are better than my weekends. True dat!

--Chelsea, PinkMence1227